Leaping over fears

There are so many things I used to be afraid to do. Paralyzed to even set out on my own, I felt like I needed someone to go with me or I wouldn’t go.

Simple everyday things like going to the grocery store or making a phone call to a stranger.

I would mentally rehearse how things might go. And if I couldn’t imagine it for a given situation, I either simply wouldn’t do it or I’d do anything I could to get out of it.

Now, even though I sometimes feel a twinge of anxiety, I focus instead on how it feels to have done it anyway. And sometimes, more an more, there’s no fear at all.

Even though my husband is afraid to fly, he’s coming with me to visit my family and our friends in Florida. It’s been nearly three years since we moved to Indiana and last saw most of them.

This will be the first time everyone, except my parents, will get to meet our son.

I’m just not allowed to talk to my husband about the trip at all or he gets super anxious and crabby.

So it’s all on me. All the planning and arrangements. All the preparations for a trip with a one year old.

This week I got on the phone and booked our flights to FL, reserved our rental car with car seat, and booked our hotel. I even picked up my little guy’s birth certificate on a whim after work one day.

I felt like a rock star. I’m nervous, but excited and proud of myself for doing it all on my own.